29 August 2010 - I have just finished a decathlon at my home club in Niesky, Germany. Daniela and I are are doing a loosening-up walk on the lawn after the 800m when we are joined by Robert, a team mate. We come to talk about the DAMM (Deutsche Alters Mannschaft Meisterschaft), the finals of the National Team Championships, which are taking place in Bad Oyenhausen this year. I express how surprised I was when I heard the finals are taking place in Bad Oeynhausen, a small town near Hanover, and the place where my sister lives! Then the following conversation takes place:
Robert: "Where is Bad Oeynhausen anyway?"
Jana: "It's near Hannover, near to Bielefeld."
Robert: "What?! You've heard of Bielefeld?!"
Jana: "Yeah, sure, it's very close to Bad Oeynhausen."
Robert: 'What?!!!! Bielefeld doesn't exist!'
Jana: 'What?!! What are you talking about? I've been there!'
Robert: 'Whaaat?!!! I can't believe what I'm hearing. That place doesn't exist!'
Jana: "What the heck are you talking about?! Sure, it exists, I've been there!"
Robert: "I can't believe it! You are the first person I meet who knows Bielefeld AND has been there!"
This is the first time I hear about the legend of the Bielefeld conspiracy, which came into existence in 1994. Achim Held, a student of computer science from the University of Kiel, posted the theory on usenet, after talking to an avid reader of New Age magazines. The post was originally meant as a joke but spread through the Internet community and has not lost any popularity even after 16 years. There are several theories behind the joke but apparently the most popular is that there was a war between the Usenet admins and the Bielefeld based Z-Netz BBS (Bulletin board system) about text encodings.
So the theory posits three questions:
Do you know anybody from Bielefeld?
Have you ever been to Bielefeld?
Do you know anybody who has ever been to Bielefeld?
Guys, unfortunately I can answer 'Yes' to all three questions! One of my old school friends from Niesky even lives there today!
What I find amazing is that the myth is still very much out there. I told this story to my sister when I arrived in Bad Oeynhausen a couple of weeks later. She hadn't heard of it either and was equally baffled. I think next time I visit my sister again I'll ask her to take us on a day trip to Bielefeld, where I will take some pictures for Robert and meet my old school friend. :)
Another funny story that I read in The Week yesterday made me finally write this post:
'IT MUST BE TRUE... I read it in the tabloids':
A pensioner who dropped his trousers in front of female diners in a branch of Pizza Hut in the German town of Bielefeld claimed he was cooling himself down after inadvertently touching his private parts while chopping chillies. Hannes Maier, 68, told police: "I did not look to see who was there. The pain was unbearable and I had to get some fresh air to my member." Despite his plea, police arrested him after witnesses said they'd seen him with his pants down outside McDonald's, too.
Clearly, after this story you must believe Bielefeld exists! :)
